Gratitude

Today I am giving thanks to all of you for all you've done to support me through this. Your prayers, light, love and good wishes worked!! I felt the calmest I have felt since diagnosis waking up yesterday morning knowing that it was all going to be over later in the day.

Dr. Troyan said the surgery went as expected, no surprises and that the nodes looked and felt normal. She took two sentinel nodes and the pathology results will be in in seven days or so. She'll call me then to go through them.

I am starting to feel human again after the anesthesia has mostly worn off and already beginning to eat normally! I don't even really need the pain meds and my sisters and husband and nieces and nephews are all pampering me. The pink clothing, notebooks, mens, pencils, hats, wine, journals, folders, jewelry are all around me representing all of you. Today a beautiful fruit basket showed up which we are all devouring. The tips I got from survivor friends and surgeons all helped to prepare me for what I was about to go through and how to ease my recovery. We now own three bags of Peas from CVS that are a cleaner version of using regular frozen peas to numb the area. I'm set with pillows for the car/seatbelt and proudly wearing my button down the front pink clothing.

I meet again with my surgeon/oncologist June 28th when we will map out my course of follow up treatment (likely to be 6 weeks of radiation up in Albany.) Next weekend my sister Karen and I will fly down to Virginia Beach to visit my mom's sisters. Flights and accomodations have all been booked.

Thanks so much for all you did to boost me up and send healing energies through the universe. You are all now listed in my gratitude journal.

I am ready!

I already feel like a survivor and cancer-free. I can see myself celebrating of negative results with friends and family although my lumpectomy surgery is Tuesday June 15th at 12:45 am.

Your emails and Facebook posts, cards and calls have done wonders for my psyche. I especially love the stories you all are telling me about your own or a loved one's successful battle with cancer. The survivor stories remind me how far treatment has come and how many before me are now thriving having been changed in a positive way by their experience.

I have been hard at work in New York City this week doing everything but thinking about cancer or hospitals or surgery. I'm going to a children's writing workshop all day Saturday. I've scheduled a 90 minute massage on Sunday before we leave for Boston. I've got lunch scheduled in Cambridge MA with some dear college friends on Monday.

And I'm already looking beyond surgery to give myself something else to focus on. My sister and I are planning a visit to see my aunts in Virginia Beach two weeks after the surgery where we plan to celebrate a successful surgery, hang, laugh, shop, visit, drink a glass of wine or two and remember my mom.

For the next week or so I will be putting my attention on healing and being a "good" patient. My support network is rallying around me to help keep me positive and the last thing I want to do is take anything out on them. I'd lie if I said I wasn't scared but I am ready for this. I am ready for it to be over.

I feel the universe reaching out to hold me up with all the light and love you are all sending me. I am literally warm inside with the energy of it. And soon I'll be sending it all back out with the celebration of being cancer-free!

Health Update

It is a strange time between a cancer diagnosis and treatment, something I have recently found out first hand. Thankfully, I have done a lot of work this year that prepared me to put it in perspective and deal with this recent setback in the best way possible.

Two weeks ago I was diagnosed with Stage I Invasive Ductal Breast Cancer. It came out of the blue but was caught early via my annual mammogram. I was called back for a second scan to check a suspicious looking area and then they wanted a biopsy. At my wonderful friend Kathy Kelly's urging, I went to the amazing new Boston Breast Diagnostic Center in Wellesley MA to get a second opinion. I was sure Dr. Levin would tell me it was nothing and didn't need a biopsy but we moved right one from what she saw on the ultrasound. Even then I was sure the pathology would be clear. It was not.

There's a tiny mass, 9mm in size, looks to be contained and treatable via lumpectomy plus radiation. After the Breast MRI which supported the prior diagnosis and suggests that the lymph nodes are probably not involved, Dr. Levin said my experience should seem more of a nuisance than a treatment which was comforting to hear. I met with the surgeon and the oncologist about a week ago and they agreed with Dr. Levin's assessment and we put a plan in place.

My outpatient lumpectomy surgery is scheduled for June 15th, next Tuesday, at Brigham and Womens in Boston. My surgeon is Dr. Susan Troyan from Dana Farber, my oncologist is Dr. Ann Partridge and my patient advocates are my experienced cancer survivor sister Cindy and my wonderful husband David. I will stay with my sister Karen for the first few days after surgery and home with David and Islay Bear as soon as I feel up to the trip.

It is a very strange time between diagnosis and treatment but I feel that I am in the best hands I can be in medically and expect to be reporting that I am cancer free very soon. They say it will be about a week before we know how the pathology turns out - we're of course hoping for clear margins, no lymph node involvement and nothing more than they can see on the scans/MRI. I have a follow up meeting with the oncologist on June 28th to decide the course of radiation which I will do here in upstate NY locally.

The picture above is a picture of my new friend Amy Grimes' forearm just before she set out on the Relay For Life which of course brought tears to my eyes. I have been getting all sorts of cards, good luck charms, pink jewelry, uplifting emails, and cancer fighting eating tips from people which is helping keep me positive and focused on the amazing things I have in such abundance.

Please keep me in your prayers on June 15th and keep up with those annual mammograms, ladies!